Although mussel‐inspired surface chemistry is one of the most utilized strategies for surface functionalization, its practical and/or industrial applications are rather limited, because dip coating can only treat small surface areas and is dependent on the coating vessel. Herein a mussel‐inspired, polymer‐based, multifunctional, and substrate‐independent spray coating strategy for surface modification under extremely mild conditions using mussel‐inspired polyglycerol is described. The postfunctionalization of the obtained surface via spray coating with silver nanoparticles results in a nanoparticle embedded coating with excellent, long‐term antibacterial properties. Furthermore, a simple method for preparing a superhydrophobic, highly water‐repellent coating by coformulation of the mussel‐inspired spray coating with hydrophobic nanoparticles is presented.